Lessons Children Can Learn From Brexit

1. It’s ok to lie to your parents providing the lie is on the side of a bus
2. Your toys are NOT for sharing
3. Your teacher is an expert in her field. Do not trust her
4. If just over half your class agree with you, you can shout over the others
5. When playing on your pretend cash register watch the British pound drop by throwing it on the floor
6. School meals will now only ever be fish and chips (NOT French fries). All other cuisine banned
7. You cannot be a member of a friendship group. All friendships must be negotiated individually. You may be part of a large friendship group now, but you will have to leave them and then speak to each individual friend separately every time you wish to make a decision. The rest of the group will probably still make collective friendship decisions without you but you don’t do cooperative working so quit hanging out with them.
8. Always cry like a baby when people disagree with you
9. Remember that a kid called America is going to copy all your mistakes
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